Facebook and I Are Getting a Divorce

Kids, I have something to tell you. After some careful consideration, Facebook and I have decided to get a divorce. We still have shared custody of the fans and pictures, but he has the status updates and I have to move out of the house.

It was a tough decision, but a few months back I saw the writing on the wall and started testing the waters with other platforms: Instagram, Twitter, Tumblr, and Google+… I’ve realized that Facebook and I were in a bad relationship and we really are better off apart.

You see, back when we first started dating, Facebook made me a lot of promises. I went in knowing Facebook had their own needs and I tried not to be naive but… I was hopeful and probably a bit doe-eyed. There was so much to love. So much potential. We could do so much together and there were some beautiful times we had together.

But then things changed. Facebook went public and needed to prove their financial stability to the world. I became less important. I tried to be understanding–Facebook had his own dreams and goals that were different from mine. But there came a point where I realized this was an abusive relationship.  And it was probably wrong (even if it felt right) to expect so much from a single platform. I put all my hopes in one place, and that is never a safe choice.

Facebook would ask me to do one thing, then get me in trouble for doing it a week later. He asked me to use him, then took everything I needed and asked me to pay him for it if I wanted it back. It wasn’t a healthy relationship.

There was so much potential. Facebook could have become the most important and successful business platform the world has ever seen. They were providing a connection between product and customer–between people looking for love, life, friendship, advice, and more–and decided that connection was only useful to them if they could put an actual price tag on it.

But my friendship and connection to all of you doesn’t have a price tag. I just wanted a way to connect and I thought that was what Facebook and I were all about. It’s not. So, I’m moving on to a place where I can feel safer–more loved and connected, not used and lied to. My fan page is still up on Facebook and I have no plans to ever change that (unless FB starts charging for that, too).  I have a personal page that you are more than welcome to friend request or “follow”. I only use it as an author and nothing else.

But I’m happy with the friendships I’ve found in other places. Instagram (though it is owned by FB) is such a great place. I’ve connected with so many readers and other writers. We share our journey every day.

Twitter is where I talk daily with my fellow writers. There is such a great and supportive community there. I spend most of my “working” hours connecting there.

Google+ has so much potential. I’ve already connected with tons of other writers and readers there. I’m excited to see where it goes.

Tumblr is also a fun place to be. I’m still figuring it out, but it’s strange and wonderful. I think I’m finding my footing there as well.

Like all bad divorces, Facebook and I breaking up has hurt. But in the end, it has changed me for the better. As I’ve moved on to other platforms I’ve been forced to reevaluate my goals and connections, rethink where I’m going over the next year and how I want to get there. I think, in the end, Facebook’s decision to become a self-centered, bullying, asshat, has made me a better business owner. This blog, for instance, is now the center of everything.

And I think that is the way it should be. Most businesses are reverting back to “Pre-Facebook” business standards. Blogs are back and so are RSS feeds. Waaaay back in the day, that is how I used to keep up with the personalities and businesses I enjoyed following. If you are interested, look into an RSS feed reader to keep up to date with the blogs you like to follow (Feedly is the one I’m using at the moment and it great on tablets and phones), that way you aren’t tied to Facebook, Twitter, or anything else to find out what people are up to (or an annoying daily email you more than likely won’t look at). Instead, open your feed and see what you want.

Facebook decided it didn’t want to capitalize on the good things it was doing. Instead it has flushed them all away and replaced them with a confusing maze of rules, contradictions, and meanness. Maybe it is better that we’re going back to the way things used to be. I don’t know… either way, change is happening whether we like it or not. And I’m moving and changing along with it.

Thanks for the happy memories, Facebook. I’ll still be around, I just can’t love you like I used to.

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Posted on March 26, 2014, in Life, Uncategorized, Writing and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.

  1. i’ve been thinking about leaving Facebook (again) a lot lately. I’ve done it before and came back, thinking that things would be different this time. I don’t really want to delete everything again, though. Being with Facebook is emotionally confusing! 😛

    • It is an emotional roller coaster! I’m happy with leaving my accounts there for occasional use and visibility, but I’m no longer putting my time and effort into a place that is so toxic!

  2. Tracie Puckett

    I used to have a heavy presence on Facebook, but I’ve stopped relying on it in recent months. I’ll post every now and then (when I have big updates on the blog), but the visibility is so low, I almost wonder if it’s worth it. I will never leave. It’s a valuable place for my readers to reach out and leave messages. I like the extra platform of communication. It’s just a pain for the business side of everything.

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